This was a topic that I wanted to spend more than 11 minutes talking about, but because we have our whole lives to have deep conversations, I wanted to talk about “perfection” when it is relevant.
Last weekend, I spent a day celebrating a girlfriend’s birthday with our tribe, which are now rare occasions that we look forward to since we don’t see each other often. As 30-somethings, we are all in different stages and phases of our lives, yet there is a common thread that we all have to deal with. Whether we’re wives, mothers or single people (like me), we all have to deal with perfection, perfectionalism and the idea of being “perfect.” I would argue that we all—male or female, single or not—suffer from feelings of not doing enough or being enough. We feel like we need to give 100% to every single thing in our lives—when really, we only have 100% to give.
Although I have not chosen the path of motherhood, I truly empathize with my girls who feel like ya’ll need to be the perfect wife, the perfect mother and the perfect career woman on top of looking perfect and being perfect in bed while doing everything and being everywhere at once. SHIT’S EXHAUSTING! This episode is for you—those of us who feel like we need to be perfect all the damn time.
Some would argue that perfection is the state or quality of being whole and complete, while others would define perfection as the condition, state or quality of being without flaws or defects. As ya’ll can see, perfection is all perspective. And until we all can agree upon a collective consensus of what perfection is, yo’ girl cannot be bothered pursuing something arbitrary. Instead, I’ve committed to authenticity. Authenticity is simply the quality of being authentic—in and of itself. I’ve discovered that my relationship with perfection only makes me feel inadequate, whereas my relationship with authenticity keeps me healthy—it keeps me growing, curious and on a path towards truth and my truest self .
I believe that a great cause of our suffering comes from the pursuit of perfection. And before we can become liberated from it, we’ve gotta question perfection together, as a whole and as a collective.
I hope ya’ll get something out of Episode 7: Perfection Schmerfection. (I really wanted to title this episode Fuck Perfection, instead I opted for the PG version.)
Thanks again for listening generously!